The saying “‘Til death do us part” is not really applicable to all situations. There are some situations wherein a couple has just had enough of each others bickering, backbiting and screaming. Just think of yourself in a specific relationship with someone you thought you could live with for the remaining years of your life, and later on realize what a big mistake it was to utter the words “I do” in front of God, or the judge. Staying in a marriage that obviously would not work anymore without you and your partner tearing each others eyes out will not make the world a better place.
What is Divorce?
The term “divorce” has been defined in more ways than one, each using different terms and words of their own, but actually mean the same thing. It is simply the dissolution of a marriage by judgment of a court. There are two kinds of divorce. The first one is the a vinculo matrimonii, which totally dissolves the marriage for good, or for worse, for those who deny the depreciating value of their marriage. And the second kind is the a mensa et thoro, which simply separates the couple.
All About Divorce Proceedings
Once the divorce proceedings have started, you have to control your emotions. You must not act impulsively, because anything that you might say or do could be held against you, which is a bad thing, in case you do not get the main idea.
Tips And Traps
There are times when the opposing counsel might want to talk to you privately. When this occurs, do not say anything to the opposing attorney. On the other hand, refer him or her to your attorney. Also, you, or your party, may only speak with the judge when the other party is present. Speaking or merely giving the judge letters without the other party is given the term ex-parte contact and is prohibited. Surely, you would not want to look bad in front of the court. Therefore, you have to avoid doing things that could harm your credibility.
What About The Kids?
Now if you have kids, that makes things a wee bit complicated because the custody of your children will have to be taken into account. In a custody proceeding, you have to keep a notebook wherein you put in the dates of different events regarding the care of your children, like taking them to the doctor for their medical check-ups, taking them to the playground for their weekly fun, taking them to school, and other significant activities that concern your kids. You must also include the form of parenting your spouse, or rather, your ex-spouse has, such as methods of discipline, disabilities, or drug use.
Another problem that may arise during custody proceedings is the skirmish that encompasses “he said, she said”, which, in turn, is very hard to prove or defend. In this case, you may use the testimonies of the doctors you take your kids to, the teachers in their respective schools, or your co-parent friends whom you meet in the city playground when you take your kids there during afternoons. These kinds of information are very important and would be very helpful for you.
Do Not Give In To Your Temper
Oftentimes, divorce proceedings can really get in your nerves since the other party will definitely try their best to make you look like the big bad witch in front of the court. And not just that, most likely, at home, your ex-lover would also drive you mad trying to unleash the devil that lurks inside you. When this happens, do not give in to the temptation of throwing a plate, or the television at his or her face, and when you have kids, especially not when they are around. If the opposing party is trying to incite you, give him or her a haughty look and simply walk away. Do not do anything that could make you look abusive.
In Conclusion
So to avoid all this hassle, before saying the words “I do”, think a hundred times first because you will never know whether you and your spouse will part only at death, or will he or she take part in your death. This proves that getting married is certainly not a joke and must be thought about thoroughly before wedding plans are made.
To Your Success,
